Thursday, November 11, 2010

Skinny Genes Part I.

 Talking about food draws attention to people's view on body image.  And I feel like it has to be mentioned, as I know it is a very controversial subject.  Not only in today's media or fashion World, but in our every day lives as well.</span>

 When I was in my teens, I continuously struggled with my self-image for being overly thin.  Of course it wasn’t my fault, even if I’d had eaten 10 juicy burgers a day, I wouldn’t have looked any different, it was in my genes to be skinny, as did my mom, my sister and many generations in my family before them.

 I was teased and mocked for the longest time in elementary and high school, was called names such as toothpick etc.  It was obviously no fun.  While my schoolmates had dates and young boy heads turning after them as they adolescent body developed into curvier, sexy figures.  My body stayed the same, only it stretched in a more vertical direction.

 I remember when in the 90’s those stretchy pans came into style, or at least they did in Hungary:).  My mom bought a bunch for me and my sister, who – despite the skinny genes – had some mild curves on the bottom and on the top as well.  While I, – even though she had two years plus on me – was completely left behind with almost nothing, but skin and bone.  And a little bit of muscle from my years spent in gymnast class, and practicing on the swim team.  So anyways, the pants fit her great, she was still pretty skinny, but it wasn’t sickening to look at her or anything like that.  While I – trying on the smallest size possible – still had a significant amount of airspace left between my tiny legs and the pants.  But thinking it was the fashion of the time, I MUST wear them, so I did.  Big mistake!  I was teased immediately and repeatedly by my classmates and some others around.  I hardly made it through the day, and remember running home after school.  My mom opening the door, and me breaking down crying, and complaining about how ugly and skinny I am.  Let me just tell you, those weren’t happy times.

 When I look back at old pictures I am surprised to see what a chubby baby I was.  An unusually chubby one.  Then a pretty little girl with a triple chin, and fat rolls on my butt and thighs.  But I didn’t develop in the same way as my other friends.

 Around the age of 11-12 I suddenly grew almost 5 inches.  I remember at the age of 14-15 getting into high school I was already over 5’7”, of course the tallest of not only the girls but amongst the boys as well.  I remember thinking, that’s it, I don’t want to grow anymore, this is plenty enough for me.  I didn’t know then, that somewhere another 4 inches were impatiently waiting to grow on me.

 I come from a generally tall family.  Most people would say what good genes I have, but believe me it’s not that comforting when you are a 15-year-old girl, trying to fit in.

 I know now that standing out of a crowd with my weight and height was the reason why I am, where I’m today, and I can’t complain.  Modeling had found me at the right time, and gave me the confidence i needed.  I have been extremely lucky not having to ever go on a diet, and make an entire carrier and great living with my looks.  I love eating, and as my boyfriend’s mother says, some people eat to live, and some live to eat.  I definitely belong to the latter group.  

 Growing up in Hungary, where pretty much every dish contains pork and potato in some form or another makes it hard to eat lean.  And being a vegetarian is almost out of the question.  Believe me I had tried it for a week just to see how I’d do, let’s just say it didn’t work out.  When me and my boyfriend Jason (no pork guy) traveled home together the first time to visit my family, it was hard to find a meal that he could eat.  As even such foods as a simple pasta dish of some sort will have pork in it.  So when my mom made an extra effort to leave pork out of the cooking and was proudly presenting her pork-free dinner dish, we realized it was cooked in pork fat.  I – of course - eat it up with much excitement.

 Hungary was never known of its lean cuisine, and its heavy eastern European dishes might be hearty and heavy sometimes, but also rich and tasty with flavors like paprika.

 So being on a diet is not the easiest thing to do, even though my mom’s cooking have gone healthier as years past on.  Food in her kitchen could still be much heavier then is some other nations.  And eating smoked sausage with warm white bread is still an every day habit.

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