Budapest

 
Growing up on the countryside, Budapest has always been a tourist attraction to me.  I have visited numerous times back with my school class or with my parents.  But now with my sister living there I have more chance to actually go and stay in the capital, and really get to know the city with all its history and glory.

 When one is from a small country such as Hungary, where there's really only one main city and the rest is the country.  The two sides become very different.  There are country people with farms, horses, pigs and endless lands.  Then there's Budapest.  Of course there are other decent size cities scattered around the country, but the capital takes the cake with its population of almost 2 million people.  Which is nearly 1/4 of the entire population of Hungary.

 People are different in Budapest.  When I was still living home, going up to the capital always felt I was visiting a place I didn't belong to.  Even after I started to travel I never felt truly home.  I'm used to  the country people, their language and social behavior.  The way people act always felt down to earth and normal - to me.  More welcoming, friendly, hospitable.  Of course there are rude people everywhere, and the struggle of Hungary throughout history really made some of its citizens sour and liveless.  But when you really get down to some of those tiny villages where people still practice some of the old original professions.  The people you find are like nowhere else.  The kindness most welcoming crowd.  Nothing fake or pretended, just pure, simple souls living a simple life.  Which for most of us is impossible to imagine in the 21st century.  I mean no computers or cell reception at all!

 Though all the love I have for the countryside, I feel an enormous respect for my capital.  Budapest is one of the oldest cities in whole Europe!  Its history starting about 1 AD with the first settlement of the Celts.  Then later it was occupied by the Romans (of course - who didn't they occupy).  They built the historical city of Aquincum.  Which is also identified as the "Town of Attila".  Yes I'm mean the in-famous Attila the Hun.  Who ruled around the 5th century and was one of the most fearsome enemies of the Western and Eastern Roman Empire.  My mom told me if I was born a boy I would've been named Attila.  Just saying!

Aquincum - Ancient Roman ruins in Budapest

 In 829 Aquincum was lost to Bulgaria.  That's when Budapest first arose out of two Bulgarian military fortresses Buda and Pest.  A lot of people don't know this but Buda and Pest used to be two separate cities before they were joined together. Wait! A lot of people don't even know Hungary exists! Whatever!  Screw them!

 Finally Hungarians (led by our famous Árpád) settled in the territory at the end of the 9th century.  Who not long after officially founded the Kingdom of Hungary.  That's when Budapest became the capital.

 One have to mention the significant cultural role of the city especially during the Renaissance era.  The National Library (which still stands today) was Europe's greatest collection of historical books and scientific works of the 15th century.  And second only in size to the Vatican Library.  I know!  Impressive!

 Then the Turks came in 1526, liked the place and decided to stay for about a 150 years.  The only good thing they had done is to build some of the fabulous baths that we still have and enjoy today.  Otherwise they almost completely destroyed the city.  And also turned it into Muslim.  At some point during their occupation there was only about 70 Christians there.  Which seems so crazy to me, knowing if they wouldn't have been defeated, Hungary could be a completely different place today.  And I mean the architecture and life style, as I really don't care for religion.

 But with the help and support of neighboring countries, we kicked them out nice and easy.  Just to be incorporated into yet another empire, the Habsburg.  Lovely!  Though in 1867 after some reconciliation the Austro-Hungarian Monarchy was born, which gave us a bit more freedom.  All though 80% of the country was still German-speaking.  Which eventually was taken over by the Hungarian language.

 Also I have to mention the HUGE Jewish population (which of course didn't help us during WWII).  In fact Budapest was often called the "Jewish Mecca".  The 2nd biggest synagogue in the World is in the heart of the city still standing today.

 We'd really done it all!  Christians, Muslims, Jews.  We had everything!

 Then the Treaty of Trianon happened which made us a completely independent country after hundreds of years of foreign occupation.  And we did go out and celebrate by joining WWI.  Which turned out to be a hell of a party.  Where we lost over 2/3 of the entire country and more then 10 million ethnic Hungarians.  How messed up that is!  Even today if you travel outside of Hungary to any direction, you'll find hundreds of us living everywhere.

That's messed up!

 Then with WWII came the Nazis then the Russians, killing pretty much everyone and making us into a communist piece of shit.

 Most of the damage caused by the wars was repaired surprisingly quickly and well between the 60's and 80's.  With that they also further constructed our famous subway (UNESCO World Heritage Site since 2002).  Which I proudly say the 2nd oldest underground system in the World(why we are always 2nd?).  Dating from 1896.  Can you imagine using the subway in the late 1800?  Wasn't the healthiest choice in transportation as they used steam engines to pull the trains.  Yuck!

 In 1989 communism fell down, and all the last bit of the Russian soldiers marched out of the country. I know because we watched them on television stepping over the boarder.  I remember I was already 8.  After that the West suddenly opened up.  And we were able to travel.

 And that's just the history of Budapest.  I hardly mentioned the architecture, the beautiful buildings, coffee houses, the Royal Palace, the Parliament in Pest, the Hero's Square, the amazing Chain Bridge, Margaret Island, the Opera House, the St. Stephan Basilica, City Park, Vajdahunyad Castle, National Museum, Museum of Fine Arts, Central Market Hall, Fishermen's Bastion, Matthias Church, the Main Railway Station, Citadella and the Crown!  And all this all lit up to perfection every single night. 

 And at last but not least the gray Danube flowing through the city, creating an airy atmosphere.

Easter Traditions in Hungary

 

 People celebrate Easter in many different ways around the Globe.  Easter being a Christian holiday, some of these traditions are naturally very similar to one another.  But I have to say there's no other nation in the World that celebrate it like Hungarians do.

 It's hard to forget waking up on Easter morning by a cold bucket of water in your face.  Doesn't sound very welcoming, does it?  It's called Ducking Monday.

Ducking Monday

 On Easter Monday morning the neighboring boys playfully sprinkle perfume, perfumed water or just water on girls.  They go around the neighborhood ringing doorbells.  The girls open the door, when the men one by one recite a generally short poem with always the same question at the end: "Could I water you?" If the answer is "Yes" they pour a pinch of perfume on the girl's hair.  For which we reward them with red painted eggs and a kiss.

I tried to translate one of the poems:

"I walked in green forest
  I saw a blue violet
  Could I water you?"

 This is a very basic one, and probably doesn't make any sense in English.  But there are some others that are borderline offensive or even dirty in a funny and entertaining way.
 
 Of course over generations the tradition has been changed a little according to regions and societies. But the main action stayed pretty much the same.

 Back in the old days, there was no perfume or kind words.  The girls used to run around chased by the boys carrying huge buckets of water.  Until pulled in a corner, or being held down.  By the end of the morning every girl in town was soaking wet.

 This side of the tradition is still practiced in many different regions on the country.  Mainly on the countryside.  Where both the ladies and men dress up in traditional Hungarian folk costumes. It's a pretty amazing site, and a fun celebration.  Full of dancing, singing and of course amazing food.
Naturally me being from the country I have had the fortune to experience this wonderful tradition on many occasions.

  In bigger cities, the man go around with perfume.  And instead of red eggs, they mainly receive money and chocolate eggs.  Which is less romantic I guess, but the funny poems they create makes it equally fun.

Needless to say by the end of the day we all stink of cheap perfume.

Egg Painting

 Easter eggs are beautifully decorated in Hungary, for the ceremonious occasion.  The traditional methods of painting the eggs are still followed by people in the country.  The patterns range from simple to intricate, and make the egg look very attractive.  The folk patterns are drawn on the eggs by using molten wax.  The painting liquid is traditionally made from onion skin, green walnut, wild pear or any other vegetable that yield natural color.

  Of course today one can just go down to the supermarket and buy a professional egg painting kit specifically made for the holiday.  Again less romantic, but also less pain in the ass.

 

Busójárás (Walk of the Busos, Legendary Monsters)

 The most spectacular of the Easter folk-festival is the so called 'Busójárás'.  Only practiced in the Mohacs region.  Men wearing frightening devil masks parade through their village, shouting and making rhythmic sounds with the help of old tins and dishes.  According to the legend, the locals once managed to scare away the invading Turks by wearing awful looking monster masks. Hence, it has evolved as a very popular custom of Easter.  Also the Busós, local men in masks and sheepskins spend the day revelling in drink, dancing and chasing girls around the town.  Often catching them and subjecting them to a friendly form of sexual harassment.

 This might all sound quiet violent and scary.  Especially compared to the US traditions of innocent egg hunt.  But for me it was always more exciting then anything else.  Plus the tasty food that comes with this particular holiday, was always my favorite.  Smoked bacon and ham, fonott kalacs (egg twist) .  Lot's of hard boiled eggs.  I could eat it for days.

 Knowing that many of the old traditions are fading.  I love the fact that Easter is something that is still enjoyed and heavily practiced by the young.  And even though I don't consider myself a religious person, it's something I would like to have around for my children and for many generations to come.

Once Was Lost But Now It's Just Annoying

A recent trip to New Zealand and Australia made me realize two things:

 #1:  Vacations are not always fun.  I've been spoiled so far with amazing trips, great hotels, first class flights (that were on time), and kind, friendly people.

 #2:  The estimation that over 99% of all animal species that ever lived have gone extinct.  That's some pretty heavy stuff.  I've always known that most creatures used to roam this planet have been long gone, before we even came along.  But 99% is a bit steep.

 First I'm going go with realization #1.  I'll get into the disappearance of species later. 

 Before I'm letting out my anger on airline crews and people generally working at airports.  I just want to give a single handed advice to everyone traveling, and checking in with one person or more.
 Please check your bag tags before it goes down the conveyor belt, as you might never see it again.  Make sure that the kind but "annoyingly ignorant and careless" lady at the counter puts your name on YOUR bag.  Not on your partners' flying with you.  So in case a retarded airline (wild example: Qantas) loses your treasured belongings, at least they can search for it by YOUR name only.  Better yet, put both of the bags under one name.  Less confusing for the airlines, as they clearly can't handle a lot.

 I've never had an airline lose my bag.  For that I feel extremely fortunate.  I've heard horror stories of luggages circling around the globe before finding their beloved owners.  Or bags lost for good, never heard from again.  I think airlines have like a 50$ cover for lost belongings.  Huh!  Yeah, right.  That won't even cover half a shoe for me.  Basically airlines do not take responsibility for handling your luggage.  Even if it comes out half beat up from tossing and throwing it around, they do not care.  So here's another advice.  Don't buy any of those fancy designer bags.  Just choose the old fashioned duffel, or some cheap wheely you really don't care if it comes out cockeyed. 

 Me and my boyfriend have this thing when we travel.  We bet on something and the winner is the one who's luggage comes out first.  It's a silly thing, but after a 18 hour trip to Queenstown, New Zealand you need something to keep you sane. 
 Of course my red North Face duffel bag rolls out first, leaving his identical black one behind.  Turns out it is really behind, maybe somewhere in Sydney international, because it clearly didn't join us on our flight.  Upsetting of course, but shit happens, and we thought it will show up later that afternoon.  And as much as the lost baggage lady is trying to help and be nice, she is nothing but annoying.  I think positions like "check-in" lady, or "lost baggage" lady were filled by people, whom are 100% incapable of doing possibly anything else in this World.  So they shove them in there thinking, they will do just fine.  Guess what!  NO!  They are retarded and incapable of doing the smallest tasks given to them.  Like asking for our contact information, in case our wildest dream comes true, and they find his bag.  Or giving us the wrong form with which we could claim the luggage, once it is found.  Again our expectations are way too high.  Thankfully a "bag loader" guy sees the mistake and runs after us with the right form.  Seriously who hires these people?

 We did come across some unfriendly Qantas people at the Sydney airport when getting our boarding passes for the connecting flight to Queenstown.  And it might just be that the local "check-in" lady there held back his luggage for revenge.  I admit we got a little feisty, but we had our reasons.  I ask all of you now.  Please recall the last time you flew with a printed out paper ticket!  Not boarding pass, no.  The actual ticket you purchased online or through a travel agent.  Think for a second before you answer!

Exactly!  Forever ago.  According to the Sydney airport staff e-tickets didn't come into use just until a couple of years ago.  So they require a printed out itinerary.  Even though she has it front of her on the computer, and she is looking at it.  As we kindly provided a confirmation number.  Excuse me!  I flew to Tokyo on an e-ticket 8 years ago.  They of course don't believe me.  They even say that my statement is impossible.  By then I'm rolling in anger.  Needless to say we have the full itinerary on our iPads as well.  But noooo, that's not good enough either.  They need a PAPER TICKET!  At that point we seriously thought we had been transformed back 10 years in history.  All though I can almost remember flying with an e-ticket 10 years ago. 

 I just read that of June 1 of '09 International Air Transport Association (IATA) members, who make up 94% of all airlines, will use only e-tickets.  I guess Qantas didn't make the cut.


 Furious and frustrated we made our way to Fjordland, soaking in the beautiful scenery of the South Island, trying to leave stress behind.  I turned on my positive mindset and thought the bag will be with us tomorrow the latest.  And even though we were planning to do some hiking, we can postpone that until the bag arrives.  Another advice.  Put some of your stuff in your partners' bag, in case this happens.  So at least you have clean underwear.  And clean socks.  So when the weather is not co-operating with your trip and rains the whole time, you can change your soaking socks.

 Once I'm on the subject of lost bags.  I came across a little place called The Lost Luggage Capital of the World.  Amazingly it is not a joke.  And if you are wondering where your never seen again rare Tahitian gifts or illegally purchased camera from Hong Kong are.  You might just want to go to Scottsboro, Alabama.  You never know.  It could be a happy reunion of lost belongings.  And hey, you can even re-purchase everything for 75% off.

After 2 nights and numerous phone calls to the airport, we were ready to give up and go shopping for at least the basic necessities for my man.  When we got a promising phone call.  They found the bag, it's in Auckland, NZ.  Don't ask me how or why it got there.  But at that point we were just happy, they located it, wherever it was.  Only when we received the luggage we realized that indeed it was in Queenstown the same day we arrived, possibly came in with a later flight.  But because we were unaware of our bag tag flip, we were looking for a luggage named Jason Rubin, while this whole time his bag had a tag with my name on it. 

Live and learn they say.  And we surely did.  Obviously not enough though, as we were yet to concur some other travel problems that I wouldn't wish for anyone.  Next to come.

Skinny Genes Part III. continued

 
This is the second half of my blog (Skinny Genes Part III.) posted on December 7th.  Continuing the horrible tips from a sick girl's diary, who is clearly out of her mind with these eating (or non-eating) habits she has.

21.  Weigh yourself before and after every time you eat.  (That's just silly.  We all fluctuate 2-5 pounds daily.)

22.  Watch other people eat.  Sometimes people eating looks so gross.  (Be careful!  It could be appetizing as well!)

23.  Find pictures of overweight people or family members and put them in various places around your house.  (Or just watch the Big Looser.)

24.  Brush your teeth and tongue whenever you hungry, this trick will keep you from eating.  (You'll be dying, but at least with very clean teeth.)

25.  Arrange your house so you won't eat.  Put things away in high places you can't reach.  If you have to get a chair to cheat you might think twice.  (Maybe works in theory, but believe me when you are hungry, you'll be getting that damn chair.  Better idea: break all chairs and couches in your house!)

26.  This is a Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen trick.  Put red lipstick on perfectly.  If you eat, it will get all messed up and all over your teeth.  (This trick might be patented by the twins, so be careful for using rights!  Also i advise to use smudge proof lipstick.  Works like a charm!)

27.  Taste your food.  Chew it and spit it out!  (What a tease.)

28.  Crest White Strips.  Here's the deal.  You're supposed to wear these on your upper and lower teeth for 30 minutes each, 2x a day.  And you definitely cannot eat while you've got these babies on.  You can have up to 2 hours a day of literally not being able to eat!  If you put them on about 15 minutes before dinner then you can't eat dinner with your family and they'll have to let you eat on your own later, which of course you'll skip.  It's perfect!  (Revolutionary!!! This chick is onto something.  She should get paid by Crest White Strips for free advertising.)

29.  Ride out the hour.  When you start to get hungry, just tell yourself that you'll wait until the end of the hour to eat anything.  That way you'll have time to think about whether or not you really want those calories, and you'll also feel really powerful since you've proved to yourself that you can go for that time without food.  (Better yet, try to "ride out" the whole month, you won't even have to think about whether you want to eat or not, because you'll be DEAD!)

30.  If you are in college, schedule classes around meal times.  You can't eat in class, can you?  (I know I can.)

31.  Stop yourself before you eat and think about what you are doing.  (WHAT ARE YOU DOING?????)

 These are some of the advices that are given to young girls.  Of course I make fun of them.  What else can you do?  It's way to ridiculous to take it seriously.  First I get shocked on how someone thinks it's healthy to be this way, then I make fun of it.

 AGAIN!!! PLEASE DO NOT TRY ANY OF THESE TIPS, THEY ARE UNHEALTHY AND WILL MAKE YOU BODY AND MIND VERY SICK!

 The fact that these girls look up to models for inspiration - or "thinspiration" as the website mentions - it's utterly terrifying to me.  The reason why some girls become, or at leasth SHOULD ONLY become models is because they are naturally skinny.  If you have to do extreme dieting - as I think a healthy diet is good -, and have to make you and your body suffer.  PLEASE DO NOT become a model!  Better yet, become a plus size model. 

 I recently worked on a shot where the company designed clothes not only in a sample but a plus size as well.  What does "plus size" means?  It ranges between a dress size 6 to 12 or even above that.  It doesn't have such strict requirements as sample size do.  If you have a great face, nice hair, and good skin, you can be as successful in modeling as any other fashion models around the World.  In fact, plus size modeling is a fast growing industry, with the media focusing on these models more and more.  Reflecting a healthy, happy body image, introducing them as the "real women".  Which phrase I don't agree a 100%.  Me being a size 4, I consider myself as much of a real women as anybody else.  But will talk about that later.

The girl I've worked with was absolutely gorgeous.  About a size 8, age 29, she was curvy with a beautiful face and a great smile.  I even bet she works more then me, or many other girls I know.  She seemed confident and happy with her looks.  But still, I felt a sense of sourness when we started to talk about the industry.  I could see, she was ok with her job as a plus size model.  But no matter how much she worked, was a bit bothered by the fact, that is still me - the sample size model - who is the main girl is a shoot we were doing that day.  As I'm the MODEL, and she is the PLUS SIZE MODEL.  I felt she wanted to be mentioned as the model only.  For which I'm not sure I'd root for, as it would probably eliminate me working as a model all together.  I told her that my ideal situation would be the 90's modeling era.  When a true 4 was a true 4.  Healthy skin, shinny hair, big smiles.  She agreed, knowing that even back then she would only be a plus size model.  But what is wrong with that?  She is still extremely lucky to be able to make such good money with only her looks and nothing else.

It seems today models have more options with the rising acceptance of "plus size".  It used to be that if your weight had changed, there was no place for you in the high fashion world.  But now there is room for all beauties. 

A friend of mine recently sent me an email with a Polaroid of a semi famous model we both worked with a couple of years back.  But in this picture she seemed at least 20 pounds heavier.  I looked her up and it turns out she skipped a full season and her agency ended up moving her to their plus size division.  I remember her being super skinny.  Her body change could be that she actually grew up, and become a woman.  Or that she finally gave in and stayed true to her real body type, the body she was always supposed to have.  Whichever is the reason, I'm glad she looks herself, and hope she is happy.  All though she could still use some toning up.  I don't want fall to the other side of the horse by saying her gaining 20 pounds it's an all positive thing.  She should still be eating healthy and exercising on a regular basis.  As I believe that those two activities are for anyone of any size.

Don't exercise to stay thin, do it to stay healthy!

Otto's Motto

 Xmas is right around the corner.  And with it all the fun holiday parties.  Despite the fact that I have a non-religious, but still Jewish boyfriend on my hands, I do get into the holiday spirit.  So decided to play old fashioned and bake something as a thank you present to the hosts for inviting, and giving me free eggnog.

 After searching online for the perfect recipe, in my head I already started seeing the drama that might go down in the kitchen.  I quickly changed my mind.  Why bake something, when you can buy pretty much anything fresh?  Groundbreaking!  With this mentality I'm never going to learn cooking.

 As I mentioned in a previous blog before, the Hungarian treat for Xmas is Poppy seed/Walnut roll.  Which is way too hard to make on my own, knowing the fact that I can't even make waffles.  But thanks for a great local Hungarian store, there's no need for any culinary talent to have a taste tonight. 
Otto's is amazing.  I'm not sure who started it or how long it has been there.  I simply don't care.  They have everything a Hungarian's belly might desire in a time of need, or when lazy like me.  They collection of import food products is highly impressive.  From fresh meats, and old school chocolates to handmade soup pasta and goose liver paste they pretty much carry anything.  The place being tiny feels a little overstocked, which kind of adds to its original old school Hungarian feel.  All the available space is used up, with an occasional handmade extra shelf added.  Stuffed with cookbooks and even a Hungarian/English dictionary.  On your way out you can even pick up the latest Hungarian magazines or crossword puzzle.  Naturally I went crazy and got all kinds of stuff.  Here some of my favorites in pictures.

Trying to decide what to buy.  You better get a little bit of everything just to be on the safe side.

"Dear Santa, this year I've been a very good girl.  For ideas on what to bring me please see attached picture above."

 
I know, i know!  Kinder is a German product.  But come on, they have Duna kavics (colored candy coated peanuts)!!!!!!!!!!  And Sport szelet (a super retro Hungarian treat)!  Ahhhhhh!

Fonott kalács (twisted bread), tepertős pogácsa (which you should all know about by now, as I have written about it before, and if you don't, it means you don't read my blog, so screw you), and MAKOS BEIGLI!!!!!  Woooohooooo!

According to the guy working there, they run out of the Poppy seed/Walnut rolls very quickly especially around this time of the year.  And every 4 hours they have freshly made ones delivered.  From where?  I didn't ask.  But I have a feeling some old Hungarian lady is busy baking away at her house around the corner.:)

Skinny Genes Part III.

 
 I've always had a low blood sugar level.  I used to faint all the time when I was younger.  Standing on the sun for long hours at the opening of our school year, I'd just pass out.  Which sometimes would go unnoticed, as being the tallest I had to stand at the end of the line.  I'd see black dots dancing front of my eyes.  My ears buzzing louder and louder, until my whole body would just give up and fall backwards.  Once I was down, the whole class would gather around me worriedly.  While a teacher lifting my legs up in the air with confidence, explaining the others that this is the fastest way to get the blood flow back in my head, like I was some sort of guinea pig.  Meanwhile me - half unconscious - trying to hold my skirt down to prevent completely exposing myself front of the entire school.  Like it wasn't bad enough I had fainted.  Giving some talking material to everyone for a full week.  I had kids and teachers casting worried looks towards me for days, ready to jump and hold me in case I'd faint again.  I felt weak.

 This happened to me less often as I grew older.  Also I had learned to control it.  As soon as I feel light headed, and see the black spots, I just sit down, have some water and breath through it.  And try to keep candy with me all the time.

 I used to do fit modeling for a well-known designer, where I was required to stand in heels for long hours.  While the team would fit their creations around my body.  Gorgeous dresses and gowns with corseted waists, tight bodices are every women's dream.  Wasn't mine at that point.  I would get light headed several times, and had to sit down to sip some water, while cursing myself and the situation.  As it is really something you can't control.  I hated myself for slowing down the work of the designing process.  What was more annoying, that I was constantly asked if I had eaten anything before coming to work.  Which of course I did.  I hoped they didn't think of me as someone with an eating disorder.

 Everybody Google-s themselves once in a while.  I type my name into the little search window sometimes just out of curiosity.  To see what's out there about me, or if anything has been updated on certain modeling websites.  I have never thought I would find myself on sites dedicated to anorexia and bulimia.  Where clearly sick individuals blog and exchange information and tips about how to stay thin by simply not eating.  I won't mention the names of these sites, but there are plenty.  Where pictures of models are being showcased as "inspiration" for the sick.  Looking and reading these websites I was shocked on how some people live their everyday lives.  Clearly obsessed with their body image, having completely lost touch with reality.  Not knowing what's right or wrong, what's fat and thin anymore.  I feel sad of course, and disappointed that fashion - which was supposed to bring joy and excitement in people's life - had brought such a terrible message.  Who can be really responsible for that?  The models?  Fashion?  Hollywood?

 Here are some of the shocking tips on how to stay thin according to one of these sites.  As awful as these next lines may sound, they are not made up, but real and were written by real women.  The following comments displayed in parenthesis are made by me.

1.  Keep a thinspiration book.  Get a really nice journal or something and print pictures of skinny        models, tips, quotes, or workouts, and glue it in there.  Look through it whenever you want to binge.

2.  Keep a stack of magazines weighing the same amount you want to lose.  When you lose weight   remove some magazines from the stack.  Use fashion magazines so that they also can inspire you as you remove as you lose.  (Hoping that with the revolution of technology in the future, paper magazines will be eliminated, and with it this ridiculous tip.)

3.  Eat on a blue or black plate.  Dark colors usually make you feel fuller faster.  Better yet, eat on small dark plates.  (Better yet, eat your small dark plate!)

4.  When you want to eat something yo shouldn't, make a list of all the reasons you shouldn't, and read it at least 20 times.  (I'd say 30 times, just to be safe.)

5.  When you get a craving, count to 100 really slowly, and it might pass.  (And if it doesn't, please refer to tip #3.)

6.  Pick one food for the day, like an apple.  Cut it into 4 quarters, eat on part for breakfast, one for lunch, one for dinner, and you've got one left over for a snack.  (You even get a snack, what a splurge!)

7.  Take a Polaroid picture or a cell phone picture of yourself wearing nothing but you underwear.  When you want to binge, look at it, and see all that fat that you need to get rid of, and carry it in you wallet or phone whenever you go somewhere where there will be food.  (This tip should be posted out front of every McDonald's in the US.)

8.  Eat with the opposite hand you normally do.  (Better yet, try your feet. 100% success rate.)

9.  Clean something gross like your bathroom, or if you have cats, clean the litter box when you want to eat.

10.  Wear tight jeans so you remember how much weight yo have to lose.  (Hipsters suddenly make sense.)

11.  Pour tons of something gross on your food like salt or pepper so you can't eat it.  (Or just give it to some homeless person. But first make sure they are not on a diet, you don't want to be rude.)

12.  Eat in front of the mirror.  Hell, eat in front of the mirror naked and see how much you want to eat then!

13.  Never eat dinner!  If you eat dinner you don't give you body enough time to burn off the calories.  (Yeah, not if every night you sit front of the TV watching bad soaps you fat f***!)

14.  Go shopping and try on clothes that you wish you could fit.  (Like child apparel.)

15. Pinch all your fat if you want to eat and see how disgusting it is.  (Wait!  That's just skin.)

16.  Stay away from food and the kitchen!  Unless your family around, then pretend like you just finished eating and getting a snack. (The 1/4 apple.)

17.  Look at super models do they look like they eat?  (Noooooooooo!)

18.  To keep a binge from coming, go outside and go for a walk, do 20 push-ups and then 20 jumping jacks after you won't feel like eating anymore.  Better yet, do them in front of the mirror.  If you see what moves up and down yo won't feel like eating again.  (Why don't you cover the interior of your entire house with mirrors, so once you loose all the weight you wanted, you will only have to deal with your own self loaded vanity.)

19.  Caffeine is great, it decreases the appetite.  (Plus it makes you go to the bathroom.  Bonus pounds off.)

20.  Munch on ice cubes to get rid of the cravings of chewing.  (Why don't you just smoke a nice Cuban then?)

To be continued...

PS: PLEASE DO NOT TRY ANY OF THESE TIPS, THEY ARE UNHEALTHY AND WILL MAKE YOUR BODY AND MIND VERY SICK!

Hungary Or Not Hungary? Part I.

When one born in Hungary moves to the US, certain differences are expected to be seen.  These are not the differences many I've met might think about.  Like, do we have electricity over there.  Or if we have TV and such.  Basically stupid questions only ignorant people ask.  I ignore those as it's not even worth my time to try to satisfy their undereducated curiosity.  Many of those don't even know where my country is, or that it even exists.  Mind blowing, isn't it.  The infamous video comes to mind, in which country music singer Kellie Pickler shamelessly admits her not existing knowledge of the World.  I had a model ask me once, if my country was in Africa.  No comment.  She clearly had no idea where Eastern Europe was.

 Then again do we really talk about Eastern Europe when mentioning Hungary?  According to my patriotic sister it's located in Central Europe.  Which I'm not gonna fight against as I haven't argued with her since we were teenagers.  What is wrong with belonging to Eastern Europe anyways?  I don't see the big deal.  But for Hungarians it's not an attractive statement.  When you look up online, you find that Hungary is in the heart of Europe between East and West.  Which is kind of weird as it's geographic location pulls more towards the East.  And the middle is more like Austria.  But again common knowledge explains Hungary as an Eastern European country.  Like it or not.

 The questions I get sometimes when i'm visiting my home country is this: How is life in the US?  I figure they expect me to say, it's wonderful, i'm so happy, everything is perfect, life is easy.  I'm lucky to say that it's pretty much the description of my current life.  But I always have to add, that it is not glamorous for all.  There are many poor, jobless and struggling people here as well as in any other place.  People work for their money every day to put food on the table.  There are problems, issues and daily complications with life.  And yes, there might be more opportunities here then in a small village in Russia, but you still have to work to make things happen. Things don't just fall on your lap.

 All though I have to say opportunities are a big part of being successful.  People always say, if an opportunity presents itself you must jump.  Yeah, but what happens if opportunities don't present themselves?  You just hang out?  I have a bunch of aspiring actress friends.  Some from the US some from other places.  I can definitely see the difference in how one growing up in LA have more open windows towards the entertainment industry then the other from abroad.  Most of them in the US were part of some drama class by the age of 5, were seen in various commercials and acted as child actors.  There was no drama class in my town.  It was a freaking communist country back then.  We had to learn Russian and Hungarian folk dance.  Didn't have the chance to watch Hollywood movies, we felt lucky if something came in from Austria.  Don't feel bad!  I had a very happy childhood.  I'm just saying.  If I wanted to pursue acting in big international movies, I would've had to jump over a couple of  more obstacles, then just deciding about which agent to choose.  After all many of today's movie stars were born and raised in LA, even went to Beverly Hills High School.  What an advantage presented at your feet.  I'm not saying even a talentless brat would've made it, but come on!  I remember Charlize Theron's acceptance speech at the Oscars.  She got up there and the first thing she said: "Oh my God, I'm from South Africa!"  She was completely shocked, and I felt her amazement.  All though she didn't have to get through the language barrier.  Which is the biggest problem for aspiring actors from around the World trying to make it in Hollywood.  So many talents get wasted, just because you were born in the wrong place in the wrong time.  And for you it might take 20 years or more to fight yourself out of it just to be in a position were others simply born into.  Plus you have to speak at least one more language other then yours.  Needless to say this statement goes to any other profession, not just acting.

 Growing up in Hungary you hear a lot of youngsters talk about how they trying to get out, and make it in the capital or even in one of the Western countries.  GET OUT!  This expression bothers me.  It sounds so alarming.  Like there's an immediate threat.  I never felt the need to get out.  I always liked where I lived, and certainly had high hopes from life, but still never wanted to get out.  I just left.  Not because I planned to.  I had an opportunity, I took it and it took me around the World landing me in the US.  I still have friends in Hungary who want to 'get out'.  Even though they have a great life and success.  They still don't see the country side of a small Eastern European country as the place for their future.  Of course I understand.  I couldn't either.  At least not now.  I've seen too much, can't go back.  But that doesn't mean life can't be good there.  Happiness is relative.  I have another friend who is complaining about how all the young people leave, instead of trying to make it there.  What happens if everyone leaves.  A country which at one point was regarded as one of the cultural centers of the Western World will end up being a place for old retirees.  Kind of sad and scary.  She thinks people should stay and make this country a better place.  Fight for the memory of Hungary, which for more then 900 years was a great power in history.  I agree with her, of course i do.  No matter how far away I am, where I live, at heart I will always remain true to my nation.  We have good food!